Some of my friends are doing this, so I’m shamelessly stealing the idea!
Dear Steven Speilberg: I forgive you for War Horse. That movie was two and a half hours of depressing torture, but you redeemed yourself with Lincoln, which is by far the best movie I’ve seen this year. I haven’t felt this way about a film since The King’s Speech hit theaters. If your film wins a slew of Oscars, it’ll be well-deserved.
Dear The Hobbit: in less than a month, I’ll be sitting in a theater watching you. My excitement is barely containable, since you are giving me the chance to re-live the most wonderful cinematic experience in my life. I met my best friend through The Lord of the Rings. My entire worldview — and life — changed with that film. And now, I get to return to Middle-earth for an adventure with Hobbits, Dwarves, Wizards, and Elves. I have my opening day tickets!
Dear Kelly Clarkson: your song, “Stronger,” is kick-ass. I’ve had it on repeat for days.
Dear Pottermore: you fill some of the void in my heart left behind with no more Harry Potter books to look forward to. You remind me how much I love those stories, and I have so much FUN with you.
Dear GPS: thank you so much for getting me back and forth in the Big City, so that I could have fondue with a friend. I’m just sorry we made a wrong turn and had to drive in a giant circle at one point to figure out where the heck we were.
Dear Terri Pratchett: I loved your novel, Dodger. How clever of you to have a character from Oliver Twist interact with Sweeney Todd and Charles Dickens! Also, I intend to have you know that once Christmas gets closer, I fully intend to watch Hogfather one cold night, with snow outside the window and the Christmas tree gleaming in the corner.
Dear Hot Topic: STOP tempting me with your merchandise. Is it not enough that you now carry Doctor Who stuff? Did you really have to tempt me into purchasing two shirts, with Ten and Eleven, on them? Why do you now keep reminding me that you also have sonic screwdrivers? Have you no mercy on my pocket book?
Dear Amy Pond: I’m re-watching your Doctor Who episodes from the start. I love your character. You are so fabulous, I don’t know how to go on in your absence. How will I ever deal with the absence of my favorite redheaded Scottish girl?
Dear Vampire Diaries: thank you for breaking up Elena and Stefan, so Damon and Elena can be possible. But curse you, because I know you won’t let it happen. No, your purpose is to torture me over a prolonged period of time, in which I continue to come back for more.
Dear Castle: … where have you been all my life? And why are you trying to make me like Nathan Fillian? That’s MEAN.
Dear Doctor Who Christmas Special: How do you do this to me? Every time you break my heart with the absence of a favorite companion (or incarnation of the Doctor) you bring along a replacement that has me loving them simply from the previews. Clara, you seem to be wonderful — and unless I’m mistaken, you are a Victorian heroine?! I love the idea of the Doctor traveling with a Victorian companion. Please, please be true. [ trailer ]
Dear Pastor: I’m a little scared and excited too, to see what you have to say about my latest nonfiction book. Your opinion matters to me more than I’d care to admit. Thank you for agreeing to check my theology before I start submitting it to agencies.
Dear Muse: having written what I now consider to be my masterpiece, I don’t know if I can write anything comparable. I hope so, because the world we’ve created together is worth inhabiting with many more crazy characters.