You know what? The world’s a liar.
And the sad thing is that even Christians can get caught up in the lies.
I grew up in a sensible Christian household with limited outside influences. But the lies still snuck in. I don’t know how it happened, or where it came from, but it did. It brought me nothing but frustration and unhappiness, until I threw the lies out and started embracing the truth. It wasn’t fun. In fact, it was hell. But now that I have come through the fire, my life is much better off.
Here are some the lies that crept into my life.
Men are predators. This lie is still ongoing, and the sad thing is that many guys have also bought into it. It has scared them away from opening doors for girls, or asking them out, because it makes them feel as if they are being too aggressive. God only knows where this lie came from in my life. I never had a guy treat me badly. My dad is great. All the Christian men in our church are great. So why did I grow up disliking men and wanting nothing to do with them? What made me write off marriage at age fourteen? I have no idea. I didn’t even realize I had a problem with men until God brought it to my attention and said, “Knock it off.”
That’s when I did a lot of repenting and crying. The scariest part was admitting it to my friends, and explaining to them how my opinions had changed. Most of them were happy for me. A few were shocked. And others had noticed it a long time ago and never said anything (which is probably wise, since I would have denied it anyway).
Wanting to just be a woman is bad. I hate this lie. It hacks up chunks. You know why I hate it? Because it is by far the hardest lie to overcome. Sometimes when women tell me, “All I want to be is a wife and mother,” I still flinch. I hate the fact that I flinch. I hate the fact that I want to go, “That’s it?” In case no one has noticed, being a mom is hard. It is also, quite possibly, the most important job that any woman will ever do, because she has the next generation in her hands, under her care. It will be largely her responsibility (and her husband’s) if those kids turn out badly. It is a thankless job in which you have to be tough – to deal with the “I hate you” and “you just want to ruin my life!” bits, as well as potty training and home schooling and everything else that goes with it.
So you know what, World? Lay off stay at home moms. Mrs. Weasley proves that just because you spend most of your time wrangling kids does not make you a pansy. Someone calling Molly Weasley “just a stay at home mom” hacked off J.K. Rowling, and it hacks me off too. Back off. Stay at home moms can clean your clock ten ways from Tuesday.
Wanting to be taken care of makes you weak. No, it doesn’t. It makes you sensible. The world is a rough place to be in, and no one can do it alone. Either you can be tough as nails, or you can find sanctuary in having someone to walk that crappy path with you. I cannot do it all myself. I won’t be able to handle losing my parents by myself. I cannot take care of a ranch by myself. And just because I can take care of many aspects of my life by myself doesn’t mean I want to. Could I change my own oil and rotate my tires? I probably could… but why would I want to?
Feminism is the solution to your problems. It is not. In fact, feminism doesn’t exist. If it did exist, there would be a lot of so-called feminists hacked off that more female babies are aborted every year than male babies, because females are “less desirable.” If feminism existed, so-called feminists would give a crap about little girls being sold into prostitution in Asia, and Muslim women being treated like dirt in the Middle-east. But they don’t, because all real “feminism” is about is pretending that society doesn’t need men. Well, I have news for feminists: we do need men. We need real men, and feminists’ successful attempts to castrate the men of our society must end.
I have no idea where these lies came from. Maybe I set foot outside my front door one day and they seeped through my pores. Maybe they were hidden in the Dr. Quinn episodes that I watched ever so faithfully (I enjoy that series, but it is the epitome of Political Correctness – oh, geez, as an adult it is so much more blatant). Wherever I got them, I’m glad to be rid of them. Life is so much stressful just to admit that I don’t have to do everything. Do you have any idea how stressful it is to grow up a female in this culture and worry about making enough money and being successful enough to live up to the expectations of the world at large? It is so not worth it.